Friday, June 16, 2006

Holy hormones batman!

So I had a baby approximately three months ago, and ever since I've felt a little "off." I'm a bit light-headed on a regular basis, and am in constant need of sleep. And don't even get me started on the mood swings!

I'm not sure if this is normal post baby behavior and/or use of hormones, or if I'm lacking something in my body. I need to get a doctor's opinion, but I'm not overly keen on saying, "Hey, I need help...but I don't know what's wrong." I know it'll lead to things like blood tests, etc., and I'm not sure that I'm into heading down that path.

Okay, I know what you're thinking. "Why wouldn't this chick WANT the help?" I guess it's because there is so much going on in my life right now, there's no more room for added stress of any kind. I am so exhausted with my daily life, that I can't breathe. A part of me thinks that going back to work would satisfy my need, but leaving my son in daycare seems selfish. And before all the working moms send me hate mail, I completely respect you. In fact, I'm not sure how you do it. Taking care of my little one, cleaning the house and getting dinner on the table feels like I'm pulling a doubleshift. Add a full-time job into the mix, and how do you accomplish anything 100%?

I know I take things a little too seriously, and at times can be over-sensitive. But trust me, talking to a baby all day without any adult interaction can get pretty frustrating. I guess I'm hoping that my emotions will float back into place, and I will return to being the woman my husband married. I'm up for the challenge of healing this void, but I'm at a complete loss as to where I should begin...

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